Begaani Shaadi me Abdulla Deewana!

Note: The following post was originally posted on my Facebook profile as a note on July 14, 2014. This is just to keep my stupid ramblings alive through archives...This is pertaining to the 2014 FIFA World cup final played between Argentina and Germany in India via Brazil! Again I have the least regards for Grammar..Pardon my silly narrative style as always ;)  

So I am at this gathering yesterday of hundreds, watching football WC final on a big screen! In 'typical Indian' lingo, I was a Abdulla whatever in some third party marriage and so were we all, all of us! But I wasn't able to locate a true Abdulla! A real big time begana-deewana Abdulla! Well actually, I was having hard time searching one, as the chunk of the crowd was strongly supporting Messi (Argentina was mere default coz of Messi, again a 'typical Indian' hero worship dreams;) and of course the other chunk was consisting of german language learners heavily supporting Germany(out of their supreme Loyalty;)! And I had my own reasons..:p

Then it happened, the real moment of truth and enlightenment when I actually came across a true Begana OR so I thought! there was this guy who would say "Haan, Haan", "Haan, Haan"  whenever the ball was dribbled from one half to the other! He seemed dead bored, It almost seemed, he just wanted someone to score(:p) to get rid of his life's frustrations!  As for the sweltering humidity of the "July Delhi", he was more worried about the Table Fan's direction than the superbly heated duel between 2 great teams! He even carried across two large dysfunctional table fans, just to find himself searching for an extra electricity switch. And all this time I was thinking, if he was being such a bored disinterested BEGANA-DEEWANA, then why would'nt he just leave?! Just go MAN! GET OUT! YOU ARE NOT NEEDED HERE..MY HEAD EXPLODED! :D

So sometime during the halftime, I finally mustered the courage to ask him, Sir, aren't you being a begana at abdulla's wedding, opps sorry, Abdulla at Begana's wedding? What's up with this "Haan, Haan"?! Then he replied to free me from my disillusionment, Brother, yes I am a deewana, but LET ME TELL YOU, that the Deewana ONLY got married after being through several Abdulla wedding tortures! I assure you bro, one day we will play football at the highest level and India would conquer the world! I am just here to create INTEREST!! YES I AM A DEEWANA or Whatever!

I BURST INTO THE LAUGH OF MY LIFE! LOL~BEGANA~DEEWANA!

He was so right, we were all there interested in a game the one we did not play or quailified for, but how simple was the fact that we could not see! We were creating there, the foundation of our own Indian football team of the future! Begana saw it, we couldn't...:) :)

Cheers!!

Hindustan Computers Limited

Disclaimer: If you have made a special mention on this page, well, you are so damned lucky and valued, because this is my page. Also, exactly 1 year ago, I was sitting with a senior VP of my organization and he asked me what does HCL stand for? LOL! The title was my answer and it still is; Never worked in a more Indianized company!! Cheers! :D

HI All

I intend to share something special which should help release my strained psyche, it’s been building for a year now! My current joint HCL and my amazing friends out there. This is for them!! Also funnily, I don't have time, I don't have time to write some personal rambling anymore, but the HCL folks deserve every bit of MY time. As if I ever owned the TIME! Also its all LOLJK sports, No offence intended, just the sarcasm only if I could muster some! The deteriorating class is palpable on the keyboard. The rust is apparent, so this is not my vintage blog if you were ever following this. :)

This is a different writing dosage; Pointers on my colleagues, some of them might run after my life on this!! Names all left to be imagined and sketched. Sitters though really!

Bantu Banter:

There is one person who is already after my life for a year now, Weird situation and will take some weird explanation. Okay, may be it’s like some dumb and delusional cattle, blocking an expressway with all her mighty fatness in glory ...Lord Save me! My message: "I am not driving on that expressway"!! Though, a really good and kind-hearted person, a rock star with a bank full of talent. About the Cattle part, its revenge on all of your Kapil act jokes on me…Its LOLJK sports. Fatness is full of cuteness, my friend. :)

Mash Cash:

This person is amazing, he is a true leader. Not that I want to gain points here but he packs a punch and is totally aggressive, like totally- and I am sure he likes spicy mustard. You also have to admire his calmness and his embodiment of MS Dhoni. Like Dhoni, he would not bother shouting on his Ishant sharma(That would be me :p), even if I gave away 30 in 5 balls, because giving me a go was his plan and he would still give me an over because he worships his planning and nor could he ever discourage any one. He is a game changer for all and amazingly unperturbed 100% winner! Also, the safest place when he is around is ANYWHERE. Simply COOL!

Deep Leap:

My old friend, who recently got hitched, God blesses his soul! LOLJK! A real good guy and also someone with street smartness, you have to understand that somewhere we are all very smart but only a few of us are able to execute it to perfection. This guy does it with so very ease and also knows how to make friends. Whatever he does to me or against me,(sending me to expressway) I could never feel a hint of despise or grudge towards him. He is a great social diplomat. An oldie pal from FCS days with whom I could discuss anything.

Gary Wary:

She is such a wonderful and warm person. With her, the biggest trouble spot I have is the 7" between my ears. (Chata lagadungi; Slap Slap). Her credentials of Btech plus MBA make her one hell of a job strategist! She is the true benchmark in the office and the professional to beat! Though she too might get hitched anytime soon, so good luck buddy and it would help us weed out a lot of unnecessary competition! Sorry I jumped the gun, there is still time. ;)

Joyous Joy:

We have a stark difference in personalities but maybe he is the only guy capable of understanding my labyrinth brain system and its maneuvers. He knows how to make experiences and enjoy experiences. An open minefield with abundant reserves of knowledge, all ready to be exploded any moment. He has his self-professed hobby of being obsessively caring to the people whom he is friends with, I don't think I'll listen to your next lecture on my career path. :p

He has his own crisis though; a simmering migraine which only a woman wearing a gallon of perfume could help with. So tie the knot my friend. 

Rest of the JOY:

There are so many other beautiful people and I don’t have the words and acumen to accommodate all. They are great, they are seniors, and they are so very helpful. Especially the two legendary ladies. They are super kind and I am being bluntly honest. Never a lie on this page. Though, sometimes they ask questions which they already know the answers to. So irritating and annoying. LOLJK! ;p

We have a lot of firepower which makes us the superpower of our organization but still we love shopping for some new firepower. There is this beautiful new entrant in to our system, who is enigmatic, energetic, charismatic, cinematic, fantastic and romantic. What?! I was testing my vocab and rhyming power. 

What is she, all that? Wait whoa! Does even the person of interest exist? LOLJK!

Not everything is all perfect in our heavenly universe. Sometimes a lot of our firepower & energy is spent in tearing some old heavyweights or rules or indulging in useless arguments. It’s like a gym situation, when someone is loud grunting lifting light weights, especially louder from others benching heavy weights.

I think we should spend all that loud grunt/energy to lift the newbies instead. :-p

One has to let go of some of their preconceived notions about people." Oh, what are those? "That they're sane." LOLJK moment. ;)

Okay enough I am not making sense now, back to old school melodrama. There is a lot of rain in this world and a lot of crushed souls. Also, it seems that I'm doomed to a life of poverty now. Damn you twitter/facebook, I feel like useless, it eats up all of my precious time and so how am I supposed to work and earn money! I am an impending implosion.

Why?! Because I have made some healthy choices which are going to kill me. I need a body sculpting plan. I love eating parathas, pizzas and hell I even started drinking and getting all high, also had a black out! Lol! BUT I also remember the day when I wrote a teetotaler piece on this page. It was a 100 years ago and now, my life is all so upside down! ;)

Phew! Enough! I had forgotten the password to this blog of mine, thank god or not but they have this recovery thing. likewise, I am all so changed and recovered! My frustrations are no longer maddening. I have been upgraded. Dating has been so uncanny; lot of girls in life is also like having no girls at all. Life is more chaotic than ever, I am sure now that it’s the standard procedure everyone has to go through. I love myself and I do pray to myself for myself!(copied from somewhere) My new lifestyle…Though 2014 will be all about change. I am sure I'm ready. Adios!

Idiosyncratic friends!

Disclaimer: Sorry for delayed come back if any one was ever waiting for this page to be reloaded. ON the contrary I reckon a day would come when millions would queue up for a solitary copy from a slum dog to a millionaire writer. Don’t mind the great potential of a narcissist, I always had it!

Cutting to the chase, this could be a final Chapter dedicated to a legendary friendship!

'25 years and we finally hit a jackpot', Kunal remarked while smoking a Cuban Cigar. 'How could we ever pull this off?' turning caustic. 'Well me a league player, can’t say about the stars shining opon you' replied my sarcastic self.  'Ok, we nailed it, Lets have at some more Kebabs!' we were drilling massive holes on our own pockets at some lounge bar in the diplomatic vicinity of New Delhi. It was celebration time dedicated to our success. I was set for Adobe systems and Kunal bagged Schneider Electric almost the same time of the year. Incredible stuff! After all, Dude is like a power transformer and I am some photoshop software! Though the power could be turned off and the photoshop can go horribly wrong as we all know it. 

We felt different as we now had the girl history behind us and a flourishing lifestyle ahead of us but who actually wanted to share any of it, so we decide to call it a day and bring down the shutter on an unusual friendship lasting more than TEN usual tumultuous years. As we head out from the bar, one unusual issue remained, as who would drop the other to their place through our own car pooling system. For the first time in history we had plans which could not get along after all. ‘I could use something to commute, take care’ he said as we see a snake in the sky. ‘Oh yeah, Delhi has a metro too’...we laughed and were headed for a cataclysmic change!

good ol days!

'Next station is Vishwavidyalaya. 'Mind the gap', The Metro man said. ‘we do mind the gap’ Kunal said, the Kannada comedy star Jaggesh lookalike would always mind the gap, especially when it came to the gap segregating him from a Stunning Stephanian beauty.  

We stepped out of the station and hear a commotion "Aajao Hindu, Stephens, Srcc, Daulat Ram, Ramjas”! 

The place was swarming with atleast two dozen rickshaw pullers offering rides to Kamla Nagar, Hudson Lane and to the colleges we loved visiting!  ‘Let’s take a rickshaw, shall we?’ ‘Sun’s shining too bright and we gotta see the bright faces’ I said. ‘But hell no rickshaw is willing to take us’ the Jaggesh dead ringer was almost right. Getting a rickshaw for us the 2008 BTech snaatakas(Degree-holders) from NIEC was a tough ask in the midst of tis beautiful DU crowd. Though we always pulled off one!
  
  

Now never was our visiting day here, when we did not ask the rickshaw waala to steer a little faster in order to catch that infatuation of ours maneuvering ahead of us. Or a day when we did not have heartbreak seeing a sensuous soul going in the direction as opposed to ours.
Rickshaw travelers also liked walking down the bungalow road and get a closer look of the red hot glamor in the offing. For some reason we losers always ended up stalking as if we had nothing to do. But no matter how loser the life was, it was still a pure bliss which was enjoyed to the core… we fought battles, we beat the devil and we came out trumps on any given damn day. This was another day as we went ahead and worked like some power pack duo. The Deadly duo!

‘Don't panic. Don't compare. Don't beat yourself about it’ we say to each other ‘He is just a team player and we are league players’ was our all-time favourite phrase for a dumbfounded boyfriend glare as we almost took his girl. It was the sheer awesomeness of our friendship. That awesomeness helped us take on the very best. We trained each other for a normal date situation to a nerve wracking job interview. Our loser slash loser luck slashed each other’s loser luck and hence we lived like the champions!

Little one had the idea that once the unusual friendship gets wrapped up, it also shuts off the idiosyncratic success mantra.

2012 was the year of the devil, which should have been ours, but turned out that we were the most angelic among the mankind and we did lose a great deal of success. I wonder why it’s the mankind with so many beautiful women around! We reckon that it should have been woman-kind. Well, we are the ultra-feminist kinds and think that the world should be handed over to the women. Oh! Digression is a thought oriented disease I continue to suffer from! But there was a major digression with our lives too as Adobe and Schneider backfired! Opposite sex opposed sex!! Unbelievable Crap is the only usual when the unusual friend ship is forced out of the equation. We hunted in pack but now were hunted by the packs. The life takes a parallel shocker as we see our ships sinking and unparalleled horror strikes and we don’t even find a helping power hand.

Perhaps it was time to ponder on my decision!

I should have dropped him that day... Petrol prices . ;)

Observing back..

Disclaimer: A part of this post is registered in my eyes, so not to be generalized. No offence to anyone/any name mentioned below. Especially to the Booz lovers, I mean really no offence or any derogatory intention, considering the negative connotation surrounding the words describing them. I tried Drinkers..even that sounded offensive..Drunkards, Boozers they all sound absurdly offensive..I mean I could not help it and I sincerely regret it as it is completely unintentional and they are just plain “words” written for fun, as always! Also, I dedicate this post to my friend “the God’s child”, after some complains over my experimental writing style in the last post and also that child (बालक :P) is the only one who still believes in me and not even me myself. Thanks so much!   

Observing!

Well, my entire life, I have been doing nothing but observing people and surroundings. It’s a very strange phenomenon, this thing called “Observing”. For me this very act of observing has become an Observance of sort. In my life this observance holds a significant place as this is a series of rites which I undergo to satisfy the self senses on the very daily basis. Tucked away quietly in the corner, is the beautiful me exercising the phenomena of this sort of corrupted/perverted “Observance”. Observing though is ONLY good to a POINT, Yes to a POINT, the saturation one. Coz once people start giving it back to YOU, it backfires big time with your ass burning like bushfire. It’s a very dangerous proposition and one should take due care before the observance of the every observing cycle, like one sacred occasion I nearly got my ass whipped, only due to this extraordinary capability of mine called observing. God Forbid!

To elaborate more lucidly, In some of the observing cases, it has been observed that the observer was himself being observed, which actually led to the disillusionment of the observer’s extraordinary illusion of being an observer. Well that’s what has happened this year. Almost entire my life, I have gone through under the table, unnoticed, invisible, but all of a sudden, I am the only thing visible to any damned random naked eye. But yeah as usual, I could never tell you what was been observed off me, except for the facts which I observe myself.

Observance case study-The Drunkards and the Holy Smokers!!

2 Sardars are breaking the ice, crushing it in to pieces and literally breaking some hard bones. The Sardars are quite the characters of the company I work in and are worth mentioning here.:p One of them is awfully diminutive but an awesomely dynamite fellow. He is also the chirp machine of the company. The chirp machine can chirp for years with the exception of the task at hand. The Ice has to be crushed such that the beers could be stored chilled for the unlimited Booz sessions to follow.

"Bloody hell, I broke the Beer Can" the diminutive Sardar Said, “Don’t worry, it wont be wasted” The other one replies. The other one is the guy nobody wants to take on, the Man is in the salary supply department and a serious Booz lover or Boozer.

“What the hell am I doing here?” I think to myself as I help sardars load the 2 volvos with insurmountable Booz. “Basically Observing” in came the inner voice. This was some office trip to some jungle, but the jungle was the least bit on any one’s mind. It was a Booz trip for the Boozers. The entire trip was an alcoholic scripted saga. Part of this amazing saga were some people who wanna show their strengths of what they call are their amazing drinking capacities without taking in to consideration their overly splendid spilling capacities. They spill either through the conventional mechanism of physical overload or they spill the beans due to the mental burden of life. Basically, the world changes...”do hell with the world", they all say.   

I have no idea what the drunkards or the boozers feel as I can never really Booz to its full affect but I do like “how they feel”. :p

Throughout the history of mankind, people like me belonging to the teetotaller race have been cussed and cursed quite heavily. But what the drunkards really do not know is that how much the teetotallers enjoy and love observing these purified souls committing the ultra holy acts. For an instance, I really enjoy listening to a dude who becomes a “dud” and tell some fascinating after- alcohol stories....Oh I forgot about the Holy Smokers, I wanna highlight here all those babes who smoke and I feel like telling them that they already are quite SMOKING and this procedure of smoke only intensifies the heat and the passion in my observance rite. ;) Aaah the Holy smoke!! Smoking kills but they all willingly kill themselves to apparently live more.-->They all just say it and they all die freaking out. Ok, enough of the smoking alcoholic monologue. I myself am not some saint but a satan. Nevamind..:D

Dream Job!

I have been searching for a dream job for ages now and the Gods have not been kind to me a least bit. Though recently God has helped me figure out my Dream job and that is nothing but being a traveler of life and culture as it exists on this beautiful planet. My cravings for a Foreign Service job are nothing but a deep inner desire to explore the pristine beauty of this amazing world full of diverse culture or to meet some of the Legends of the past. Nah! That’s another requirement, not possible in these turbulent times called the present. 

I really wish my job profile could have been of the likes of the Great Columbus or the Great Vasco da gama Or perhaps the most renowned medieval traveler, the Great Ibn batuta. Seeing my own country from his eyes would have been the ultimate treat while serving the stubborn yet a fine administrator Shah Mohammed bin Tughlaq, possibly the greatest Islamic ruler India ever saw! Tughlaq in India has almost become or being used as synonymous to being bold or being like a risk manager.*(Chak de India’s main character was called Tughlaq..I seek forgiveness for a silly instance :p).  Or I could have met the founder of our present foreign services code and conduct, the Greatest and my personal favorite, The Chanakya also known as Kautilya. For the present times though, Nicolas Sarcozy’s hot wife Madame Carla Bruni would be a nice rendezvous.;)

Now, I can really cut short some cut throat competitive exam hassles and could rather seek some nice capital inflows into my personal bank account to become a true traveler of this planet traversing thousands of miles. But capital is another issue. This is not an easy world....”gone were the days” for a nomad of a character born in the 20^th century. Worst timing--> fenced or Sealed Borders, passport, visa and capital fiasco world!! :(

My Babe!(Formerly, Aston Martin)

Though it’s just a machine and it’s not my life either but it is a thing which drives me and takes me to places. Not always to the intended ones, but yeah it does take me places. She is the only babe in my life for which I aesthetically invested back in ‘09. I love her as it has been the lone carrier of my life in the recent past....It's been 2 years and we have been happily married .Nah not 2 years ..It’s a mutual synergy affair. So it’s 4 Years!!:p Though, I date back to the late mid eighties and she is a 21^st century babe, still quite astoundingly, the car encompasses my life and its current situation.

The recent weekends!

Getting away with my Babe to an unknown destination, I start to sum up my life experiences. I am in to the first gear and the car was barely moving before I switched it on to the second, which is still darn slow and along came the reasons of all my frustrations, rudeness and pain which were some bruises from some fallen relationships. Though, it still did not suffice the situation and my mind needed some reconditioning so I took the third gear and along came some broken dreams and some distinctly unglamorous companies for which I worked. I thought about my ruined professional cum personal life but for some how things were not moving ahead and then I realized that both my mind and my babe’s engine were overheating as I never really pulled the lever for the fourth gear. But I finally did and along came the picture of the trauma for which I can simply blame people and circumstances to set my ego high. But then a part of me wanted to set it right and free. This state of my consciousness wanted me to take things as they are, it wanted me to forgive people and forget things and so I pulled it to the fifth gear and it was now a free flowing state. This was the state of pure solitude of consciousness and it is a state which is happy being alone, it is at ease with its own. It finally believes in 'Let it be'....

Yes let it be....it is! Following my babe’s recent road crash has made me bury all those pains.  Yeah she is hurt bad and I realized that it’s part of life and we both have to move on!

For the whole life we keep searching happiness in others and give weightage to the momentary events of joy but the real happiness may reside deep there in our own soul. I intend to search for it and live abundantly :)

Happy 2012 to you all!!

जय श्री कृष्णा!